How losing my phone pressed the reset button just as a period of sobriety can do
Although this isn’t entirely drinks focused, it is a topic that is being repeatedly brought up and ultimately affects us all.
Over the past six months, I have started listening to Podcasts around ‘being present’ and the impact our phones have on our mental and physical wellbeing.
It feels fairly obvious and not something that needs further exploration, but that is actually far from the truth.
Each day, I am seeing more people take social media breaks to positively impact their mental wellbeing, and with phones creeping into our lives over the years, almost without our knowing, it is crucial we learn how to take the positives and minimise the negatives.
That, without a doubt, requires knowledge, self-awareness and definitely discipline.
When do I use my phone?
When I wake up in the morning, my phone is sat next to me on the floor. That in itself is supposedly bad for your health. The blue light coming from your phone actually slows down melatonin production and disrupts your circadian rhythm meaning it can be harder to get up or go to sleep.
During the night, these pesky blue lights have been interfering with my happiness and my sleep quality, but being right next to my bed I reach out for it straight away. Sometimes to help me wake up and almost always to check my emails. An email requiring attention and stress inducing means I have woken up in an agitated and fast-paced mindset instead of taking time to wake up with a book, a coffee or a walk.
Moving on to the day time, my phone sits next to me while I work. It is a crucial part of my job with social media, phone calls and text messages, however it is distracting. Your phone is designed to be addictive. A notification flashes making you want to check it. A message vibrates. That one second of distraction can be 30 minutes off on a tangent, in a social media scrolling hole and can take quite some time to re-focus back to the task at hand.
As I walk to the gym or walk to town, I have my phone on me. I should be taking in the walk, breathing deeply and using this time to give my eyes and brain a break, however I am often doing things on the go. Emails, social media, writing.
The worst one that I am sure we are all guilty of is being on our phones in public or in company. It is my pet hate, yet I am guilty of it and this is why I started to work on myself and being more present. I believe being in for two years over the Pandemic may have made us more reliant on our phones as this was a time of serious virtual connection. We would sit in and speak with people on our phones, however with ‘normality resuming’ this continues to be the case.
Acknowledging my behaviour
After analysing it with others and with myself, I listened to a podcast by Steven Bartlett as he spoke with a guest about the power of being present and limiting your phone use. Steven is extremely honest as he talks about him and his wife spending the day together without phones. He says how he feels anxious and stressed without his phone and that limits him being present in the moment.
This highlighted my own habits and I now therefore try not to use my phone in public in case I might be able to spark an interesting conversation with a stranger. I force myself not to use my phone with family and friends. Whatever I am doing on my phone can absolutely wait - the person in front of me is far more important. You never know what is round the corner and spending that time is more important than pointlessly scrolling or getting back to an email a little quicker. I limit my use when spending time with Richard. Put my phone out of reach so I can’t see notifications and am not tempted.
So, my journey started a few months ago as I began changing my habits, however I lost my phone (while packing JOMO boxes actually, so if anyone received a phone in their box, give me a holler) which really took things to another level.
I am currently day four without a phone and this has been the journey.
Day one - Saturday: I kept calm. I had a talking to myself that it was only a phone, and there are more important things happening in the world. We went out for dinner in the evening and I wouldn’t have needed it then anyway.
Day two - Sunday: I started to realise that tomorrow was Monday and that I run a business. A key part of running JOMO on the go is being accessible and working from my phone on the move. I started to panic that partners may not be able to get hold of me and that a number of images from a photoshoot was on my phone. I also felt a lack of connection as I couldn’t reach any family or friends.
Day three - Monday: JOMO Shipping day. Usually I can go out and track how far the courier is from pick up. However, I had to stay in all day and couldn’t go to the gym as the minute I left the house I would have no way to communicate. I also listen to podcasts to further learn and while walking and in the shower. This felt lacking and quiet.
Day four - Tuesday: Walking to the gym without a phone meant that I thought about things. No distractions, just my mind. They say people keep busy because they are afraid of their own minds. I can empathise with that - I’m not afraid of it, but my thinking made me address things from the past couple of years, which was no bad thing.
Day five - Wednesday: A new phone is arriving in time for a press launch on the Thursday. A phone is needed while in London to communicate, work on the go and take photos too - a crucial part of content creation for JOMO.
What questions has this raised?
Your phone does keep you constantly distracted. Do we need the silence for our own mental health and to connect with others?
Is your phone the biggest distraction limiting your productivity?
Being present not only with people but also in life without our phones.
You aren’t actually missing that much!
Best practices
Although this has raised some interesting thoughts, it has not meant that I am now going to be without a phone. There are absolutely positives of having a phone and without it we would be unproductive too in some ways, however I believe there should be some boundaries to maximise the positives. Losing my phone has been a great way to reset my relationship with technology, just as removing alcohol can do to assess your relationship with alcohol.
These are the key takeaways that I am going to try and implement in my life:
Allocate social media slots. This will keep me productive and make sure I am not deviating from the task at hand.
Not be on my phone whilst walking, standing in public or spending time with my favourite people.
Continue listening to podcasts and music - this is important for me. It makes me happy and keeps me feeling productive. I am naturally a busy person.
Use the gym as the gym. People can wait for an hour whilst I work out.
I hope this piece has been helpful to you, just like Steven’s podcast was to me. You don’t have to lose your phone to assess your relationship with it, but you might like to start putting boundaries in place if you have felt your usage increasing or perhaps hearing some podcasts from experts.
We would love to hear more about your experiences and how you feel phones have impacted our lives.